So far I have failed to recognize the imminence of sorrow. I am surrounded by the broken remains of society, and it is not possible for me to change them. I have to let God do what He will, and He has given them freedom of choice. I am so sad for the things they choose. God almighty I leave my life in Your hands. I trust You will all the minute details. It is very hard not to be able to see the future. Do You want me to stop looking at all? Don't You give me the responsibility of planning for things so far as I am able. Is that what it is to plan what I can and ignore what I cannot change. It would be easier just not to think at all of the future, or to think of everything. This balance is difficult to maintain.
It is not so much whether I do or do not understand the way the world works. It is only essential that I understand the way God wants me to work. I believe that He wants me to remember that everything is from Him, that He is the only real source of strength. In other words, truly be completely and only dependent on Him. This is so hard to learn. It is only God who exists.
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